It’s wedding day, fam! Or “wedding episode,” anyway; on this week’s installment of Love Story, JFK Jr. and Carolyn Bessette finally get hitched.
Although I happen to think minimalism is deeply underrated when it comes to wedding dresses (when my time comes, I plan to tie the knot in some sort of voluminous, Kika Vargas-ish monstrosity), there’s no question that CBK’s Narciso Rodriguez-designed nuptial look was one of the greatest of all time. Let’s see how the show interpreted it, shall we?
Below, find quite literally every thought I had about Season 1, Episode 6 of Love Story:
- Damn, I forgot the whole “Battery Park” fight was filmed by reporters.
- Ethel Kennedy’s not loving this!
- God forbid a bitch be a little bit Italian and volatile.
- I feel so deeply for Carolyn, as someone who’s been trying to please mean, older blonde women since I was a small child (hi, Mom!).
- Aw, Ethel’s being kind of nice.
- Only CBK could make this Steve Jobs turtleneck cool.
- God, not even for a man as hot as JFK Jr. (or Paul Anthony Kelly, for that matter) could you convince me to submit myself to the world’s scrutiny at this level.
- “Carolyn, these men, they will break your heart.” You can’t say she wasn’t warned, I guess?
- I feel like being screamed at by your girlfriend in a park isn’t that bad, in the grand scheme of Kennedy scandals?
- LMFAO at Caroline chugging her inch of red wine upon learning that John and Carolyn are engaged.
- That’s one way to say mazel tov!
- John and Carolyn splitting a joint and a bagel… couple goals.
- Or is that just a poorly rolled cigarette? Sorry, I’m washed.
- It’s so psychotic how beautiful Sarah Pidgeon is, all the more so in her man’s sweatshirt and with unwashed hair.
- LOL at John’s description of Ed Schlossberg on his wedding day: “He looks like David Byrne, but also someone who’s never heard of David Byrne.”
- This, in a nutshell, is the essence of John’s hotness: he is addicted to saying yes to Carolyn and letting her run him like a Forbes 500 company.
- Getting contact hives at the thought of limiting a wedding guest list to 40 people, and I’m not even a Kennedy.
- If any straight men are reading this (unlikely): Let your fiancée plan your entire wedding while also appearing to be interested and helpful, and you will have a long and happy marriage.
- Yes, Carolyn! Down with the wedding-brunch industrial complex! None of my married friends have even made it to theirs, because they’re always too hungover!
- Oh my God, the stunning charm of Pidgeon in this fun little “which ex did you go to Cumberland Island with?” bit.
- She’s clearly still salty about Daryl, though.
- Oh, these fucking nerds just dancing around together!
- This, to be fair, is also why John was hot (a real case of “I let him hit ’cause he’s goofy” syndrome).
- Uninviting the Lee Radziwill? Cold as hell!
- God, Michael is such a loser.
- I mean, yes, John is very much locked in on planning his wedding in their workplace, but when the boss is distracted, the workers shall play!
- I’m really going to need Caroline to play ball a little bit re: Carolyn and the wedding.
- Did Ed Schlossberg invent urban foraging?
- It is kind of fucked to weigh in this hard on your brother’s wedding, IMO. Let Carolyn do something rustic!
- “I’m lucky that Mummy’s too dead to come to my wedding?” Oof.
- Every Catholic clan needs one silly-ass Jew (Ed) to lighten the mood. Granted, my family is mostly Jews with the odd Catholic in the mix, but the principle stands.
- Carolyn and Lauren doing TV aerobics is so charmingly ’90s.
- Girl, don’t make Caroline your maid of honor! As Lauren correctly says: “This will mean nothing to her, and it would have meant everything to me.”
- Sydney Lemmon is really slaying this role, which is nice, because Lauren Bessette’s death was also a huge fucking tragedy.
- Aw, Carolyn’s will-you-be-my-maid-of-honor speech to Caroline is actually insanely sweet.
- Calvin, girl, ease up about the dress!
- Hair color shift mentioned!
- And Carolyn’s quitting?
- Okay, fine, tough day for Calv.
- “From one who considers himself a visionary…”
- What a tool.
- Actually, I guess he’s being vulnerable and I’m being a bitch.
- Oh, and he had sketches for Carolyn’s dress in a drawer all along! Sob.
- The music supervision on this show is really kind of a consistent slay.
- Need to ride a wild horse in Georgia ASAP.
- This wedding-eve note from John to Carolyn is so cutie 🙂
- Somewhat less cutie is Carolyn’s mom’s apprehension about this wedding.
- Can’t really blame her, though!
- “I see you making your life smaller.”
- Ugh, tea.
- I love that Carolyn’s mom’s response to Carolyn saying John isn’t interested in politics is basically, “Girl, wake up.”
- Never forget that this POLITICS + FASHION = PASSION thing was real!
- Oh, Carolyn’s mom, pack it up.
- You got your chance to warn your daughter! You don’t need to do it again in a damn speech!
- If there were ever a moment to be smoking a cig……..and yet, Carolyn’s on the beach cig-less? I don’t buy it.
- “I’m going to be your wife forever” made me cry a little bit, because “forever” was not long enough for John and Carolyn.
- Absolutely perfect Nina Simone needle drop.
- I know sleeping on the beach (post-sex, presumably) is supposed to be hot and romantic, but my God, wouldn’t sand just embed in your scalp? And everywhere else?
- Now, this wedding-day skinny-dipping scene, on the other hand, is hot and romantic.
- I am looking respectfully at Kelly’s ass.
- All this drama about the delay. Weddings run late! Whatever! There’re, like, nine people there!
- The complete absence of Carole Radziwill at this wedding…Ryan Murphy really said “I’d rather not get sued today, thanks all the same.”
- Carolyn smoking in the tub with her sunglasses on is proper diva representation.
- As is Lauren soft-forgiving her but refusing to share her Champagne.
- The candlelit walk down the aisle…I’m dying!
- Aw, even Carolyn’s famously pissed-off family looks happy at how sweet these two are on the dance floor.
- “Everything ends.” “Not us.”
- Oh, girl, I am sobbing.
- Like, my dog just put his little paw on me in his version of a wellness check.
- Sorry to be gauche and link to my own tweet, but:
